a lot on my mind.

So I’m in my third trimester already (been a couple weeks since) and hence, a lot of thoughts have been going through my mind. Like preparing myself mentally:

  • on how giving birth will be like/birth plans
  • the presence of a child in our life
  • sleepless night
  • pantang days & so on..

Of course, the first point would be my main concern as of now. I don’t know if my pain threshold is high or not. If based on my menses cramp last time, I’m always weak..vomitting and lying down in bed :/ Kalau giving birth is x1000000 much worse than cramp, macam ane tu? InsyaAllah boleh..

Many have advised me not to take epidural coz of the side-effects. Kalau sakit, tahan je. Senang eh cakap? The other time, I was at Joo Chiat looking for baju that will fit me for a wedding, the seller of one of the shops touched my stomach while I was browsing through their collection. Terperanjat jap. She asked me a lot of questions and even teach me how to use the laughing gas based on her experience. So weird but interesting jugak. Anyway, I told myself that regardless of any giving birth methods, it will be okay as long as both baby and I are safe. “It won’t make you any less of a mother” – Now I understand that feeling. You can’t help but have that expectations of yourself. You want to provide the best for your child. Ni belum masuk chapter breastfeeding lagi. Praying that everything goes smoothly from now onwards. InsyaAllah.

Don’t really have particular cravings at the moment but I get hungry every single seconds! I had one packet of Nasi Goreng Cina for lunch (trust me, the portion is quite big) and was hungry again the moment I finished it. Melampau kan! I complained to A and he finds it cute -.-” Instead I had to keep snacking just to keep myself occupied. Sometimes, I felt bad when I complained to A I was hungry at night. He would either order online or buy something for me to snack on :/ We spent a lot of food rather than baby items. Lol.

On a different note, baby is actively kicking. Alhamdulillah. It’s considered good after the previous incident. Still awkward trying to talk to the baby besides saying ‘I love you’ every single day. With just that, I’ve grown attached to you. It’s amazing how you can love someone without seeing him/her 🙂 #motherinstinctkickingin

Okaylah. I shall abruptly stop here. Too tired to think now.


9 thoughts on “a lot on my mind.

  1. about the epidural babe, just to let you know, not everyone will get the side effects. my friend didn’t had any and for me alhamdullilah at that point of time, everything went smoothly… the insertion all but i’m experiencing the side effect now. my back will ache and hurt at times and bile da saket… mashaAllah urut brape kali pon tak jalan. i just sental minyak panas banyak banyak. but whatever it is, it’s our decision on how our labour should be like and if we need to use epidural but suffer the side effects later on, to me so be it la asalkan baby selamat keluar. yes my back aches like mad at times, but i’m so happy seeing dina everyday. (cannot stand people who arrogantly look down on others who use epidural whatnots lol!)

    • Woah, i didnt know you had epidural also. I get very annoyed when people advise against it, calling them “lembik”. The pain will be sure be worth it after seeing your own child 🙂 ahh..cant wait for my turn!

  2. Hey babe, I took epidural when giving birth to Khalisah and Alhamdulillah no side effects thus far! The gas didnt work at all for me and I couldnt tahan the pain since I knew I would be in the labour ward for quite some time (12 hours!). It’s true- epidural or no epidural, it doesnt make you less of a mother. If anyone tells you otherwise, you just karate them je.

    Before I gave birth, I told myself that I would do it the most natural way possible, just to challenge myself. But then jengjengjeng, contractions sampai melutut ke lantai semua, natural kehaper hahaha. So it’s best you decide when the time comes k!

    Third trimester will pass by really quick! So excited for you! 🙂

    • Itulah! I told the lady who touched my belly that most ppl i know (thru blogs) said the gas doesnt work. Dier mati2 ckp it works if you do it correctly -.- anw, da sakit kan. Correct or not, tk kuase nk pikirkan.

      Haha! Looks like we have the same mindset. Natural birth..but i got a strongg feeling i will give in to epidural. Lol. Thanks babe! Excited + seram sejuk 😅😅

      • It’s going to be worth it seh babe. The first thing that I wanted to do when Khalisah came out was to look at her face! Oh and she was vacuumed out cos she didnt wanna come out (member keluar tapi masih tidur zzzz) so….. You kena byk berbual dgn baby towards your edd k!

  3. Babe seriously the laughing gas tkde effect langsung pls. Buat rimas je. I also tried my best not to use any painkillers. Im not allowed to use epidural coz i had back surgery so i lagi pressure seh! Doc said if i cant tahan i kene c-sect w general anaesthesia or however u spell it. Seram kan! I so scared thinking what if i dont wake up at all if kene c-sect :/ and seriously i couldnt tahan the pain seh and wanted to gv up and just go for c-sect coz cervic tknk open! But doc pujuk me to try morphine. Alhamdulillah it works like magic! Contraction nk dtg je, i press morphine, get high and sleep skejap lol. I press2 like my life depended on it until my hubs confiscate seh bila dah 9cm. Coz takut i get high and cant push. After delivery i couldnt hold and feed my baby for long coz masih ada morphine effect. Thats the only cons to me. So maybe u can try morphine first see if it works for u. Nvrtheless u know ur body best. If u feel betol2 tkleh tahan, just dont wait until last minute to ask for epidural! Insyaallah i pray yg terbaik for u and baby. Sorry kalau my comment buat u lagi takut. Im excited for u! :))

    • Woah! Thank you for your comment! I’ve read blogs but never come across morphine yer experience. Shall talk with my gynae as one of the options for my birth plans and hear her opinions. Ya, I heard that epidural will take some time. Ahh, decisions decisions. Thank you so much! Appreciate it 😀

  4. Salam sis, I am not married yet but I agree with all the comments above! Epidural or not, laughing gas or what, you carried the child for 9 months and that in itself already makes you an amazing mother. Kirim salam SHASHA!

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